At the height of the Gulf War, the expertise of Red Adair (that well known firefighter) was called upon to go out to the gulf and put out the oil rig fires.

On his way, his plane landed in Ireland for an overnight stop so Red took advantage to visit the local bar for a pint of the black stuff. On entering the bar two old Irish boys witnessed him walk in and one said to the other, “Isn’t that Red Adair?”  

The other replied, “No.” 

The old boy then said, “I’m sure it is and I’m so sure that I will bet you a pint if I am wrong.” 

The doubting one said, “OK,” and they both went over to Red and the one said, “Are you Red Adair?”  To which Red said he was. 

The doubting Irishman said, “Are you still dancing with Ginger Rogers?”

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Two Heads are Better than One

An American tourist traveling in County Clare, Ireland came across a little antique shop in which he was lucky enough to pick up, for a mere 200 Irish punts ($350), the skull of Brian Boru (940 to 1014) who managed the rare feat of uniting Ireland.  

In a turning point in the war with the Vikings, Brian Boru defeated the Viking leader Ivar in single combat. Not only was Brian successful in battle, but he also had at least 4 wives and founded the O’Brien clan. 

Included in the price was a certificate of the skull’s authenticity, signed by Brian Boru himself. 

Fifteen years later the tourist returned to Ireland and asked the man from Clare, who owned the antique shop, if he had any more bargains. 

“I’ve got the very thing for you,” said the shopkeeper. “It’s the genuine skull of Brian Boru.” 

“You cheat!” exploded the American. “You sold me that fifteen years ago.” And producing the skull added loudly, “Look, they’re not even the same size!” 

“You have got it wrong,” opined the seller. “This is the skull of Brian Boru when he was a lad.” 

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Look to the Moon

Paddy and Seamus were walking home from the pub. Paddy says to Seamus, “What a beautiful night, look at the moon.” 

Seamus stops and looks at Paddy. “You are wrong, that’s not the moon, that’s the sun.” Both started arguing for a while when they came upon a genuine drunk walking in the other direction, so they stopped him.

“Sir, could you please help settle our argument? Tell us what that thing is up in the sky that’s shining. Is it the moon or the sun?” 

The drunk looked at the sky and then looked at them and said, “Sorry, lads. I don’t live ’round here.”